At Surf Synergy in Costa Rica, I didn’t just learn how to surf—I learned how to fail in front of my daughter and be okay with it. Over a week of crashing waves, pop-up drills, yoga, breathwork, and shared meals, both of us left stronger, braver, and a little more sun-kissed than before.
Letting Go of the Fear of Being Bad
Until this trip, I’d avoided anything that might make me look incompetent. Surfing. Golf. Poker. Asking for help. I’d grown into the kind of adult who would rather stay in the shallow end than risk failure in public. My daughter, on the other hand, had been surfing since she was seven and moved through the water like she belonged there.
So when the opportunity came up for a surf retreat at Surf Synergy in Jacó, Costa Rica, I told myself it was for her. I’d go along for the ride, maybe dip a toe in. But I was 45, and the idea of wiping out on a board—especially in front of her—was terrifying.
Welcome to Surf Synergy
Surf Synergy isn’t your typical all-inclusive. It’s more like a community retreat. Guests stay together in a beautiful jungle compound near the Pacific coast, with surf sessions, yoga, breathwork, cold plunges, sauna time, and even jungle waterfall hikes all included. Everything—meals, transport, instruction—is taken care of. You just show up.
And show up I did. Each day, we headed out to the beach in a group. We trained with private coaches (mine was a ridiculously patient 26-year-old named James), ate delicious meals prepared by the house chef, and bonded over communal dinners. It was like summer camp for grown-ups—with more sunscreen and fewer campfire songs.
The Joy of Failing in Public
I was not good. I struggled with my pop-ups. I forgot to stay low on the board. I collided with other surfers more than once. But no one judged me. They laughed, offered high-fives, and shared their own crash stories. No one was trying to be Kelly Slater. We were just trying.
Eventually, I got a little better. Not good, but better. I managed a few rides to shore, heard some cheers from my new friends, and realized something: being good wasn’t the point. I was in the ocean with my daughter, and I was having a blast.
The After-Surf Synergy
Back at the resort, we did yoga with ocean views, learned to hold our breath for minutes at a time, and soaked in the jungle steam. My daughter devoured books between sessions and watched herself on surf video replays each night. She was proud of herself—and I was proud of me, too.
More Than Just a Surf Trip
Surf Synergy is expanding soon, with deeper wellness offerings in partnership with Vail Health. But right now, it’s a hidden gem. It’s where parents and kids can reconnect, where adults can fall on their faces and laugh about it, and where strangers become cheerleaders.
“I never got anywhere close to being good at surfing, but I started to think that maybe being good was beside the point.”
If you’ve been putting something off because you’re afraid of failing—whether it’s surfing, painting, or just being a beginner again—consider this your sign. The water’s warm. The waves are waiting.
